Preppy+Group

By: Melissa Harkness, Olivia Grau, Colin Land, Sabina Schill

Scene 1 Caesar: Hey! Lookit soothsayer! Today's the Ides of March and I am still here! Soothsayer: Umm.... but the Ides of March are not over yet....... Caesar: Yeh I know! But I'm still going to be here aren't I?!?!?!?!... Yes I am!

Artemidorus: Caesar, yo! Hey, man you have to read this note that was written for you, NOW! Caesar: Are you serious? Now? Hey, I'm about to present myself before the school assembly and you want to bother me with a note, come on man! No. Artemidorus: But-- Caesar: I said no now go, away.

Popilius: Hey, Cassius. Cassius: Yeh? Popilius: I hope he falls today as well. Cassius: What how did you-- Popilius: Shhhhh, here comes Caesar, shut up!

[Caesar stands in front of the whole crowd]

Metellus: Hey dude, how you doin'? I just wanted to tell you that you are a pretty cool guy and yeh...thats pretty much it.

Caesar: Well thanks man, but I already knew that, I'm ruler of this school and everyone looks for me to see if their wearing the right clothes or talking the talk or walking the walk! I am the best!

[While everyone says the following they are trying to hide their snickering]

Metellus: Yes you are.

Cinna: Yes you are.

Decius: Oh yes you are.

Brutus: [slightly hesitantely] Ohhh Yes...

[//THEY ALL STAB CAESAR//]

Caesar: Oooooo, mmmmmyyyyy, goooooosssssshhhhh....... are you serious?

[Caesar dies.]

Cassius: Hey everyone!

[Audience gasps in the sight of Caesar's blood all over Cassius' hands]

Cassius: oh... Well yeah just to tell you, we killed Caesar and we all wanted to say that we did this for the benefit of you not us. We loved Caesar and maybe even more than you did. But we love the school even more and we needed to save it from the corruption that Caesar was going to cause this student government. I mean seriously guys, the guy got straight C's and you thought that he was the greatest thing like ever right?

[murmers in the crowd]

Brutus: This "killing" everyone has made everyone like better in a way... so you guys can have a better school experience... don't you understand that?

[crowd murmurs yeses all around]

Brutus: So as we end this assembly for class government and such, I'm gonna take Caesar's body out of here and with it the feeling of corruption and like everything bad in this school and we can all start fresh!!

[cheers and hollers of approval from crowd]

Scene 2 [Disturbed by Caesars death, Brutus, Cassius and a group of students enter.]

Brutus: Go somewhere else and speak to the other crowd Cassius. Tell them why we killed Caesar.

[Cassius exits to talk to some citizens]

Brutus: Guys Im talking here. SHHH I'M TALKING! Ehem, Just so you know I didn't love Caesar any less than he loved me. Like, idk I didn't want to kill him but our school is more important. Like, oh my gosh, for instance you guys would have all become slaves! Slaves to Caesar duh! Didn't you see it coming! You should love your country more than you love one man. So I had to take part in killing him. Is anyone stupid enough to disagree with me? Am I right?

All: Nah! We get you. Brutus: I've said enough. You all know Caesar was like, a bad person and I dont have to prove myself. Sooo, I'm glad everyone agrees with me.

[Enter Antony and others with Caesars Body]

Brutus: Even though Antony (he's so awesome like, you have no idea) didn't help in killing Caesar he will now be a part of the student body! That's so cool isn't it? Oh my gosh. I love our school forever, like you have no idea. More than you know.

All: We love you Brutus! Go Brutus, Go Brutus!

First Citizen:Lets build a statue of him! and and we can bring noise makers and loud music and hail him. He can be our Caesar.

Second Citizen: Wow, I think we should like make him really powerful. He rocks. Caesar was so... ughh! Controlling and ambitious and ew!

Brutus: Be good to Caesars corpse though, he wasn't all that mean. And listen to what Antony has to say. And stay here!

Antony: Guys listen! (they talk to much) Yeah we all know Caesar was big headed and all and he wanted to take over the world but he was like an alright guy sometimes. I mean I was friends with him and he did help us out a little. Like he sold lots of stuff at fundraisers which brought in money for all of you. Heh, we all love money. And O.M.G. remember when he was offered the crown 3 times at homecoming and he turned it down! And he sympathized with the anime geeks. Like what kind of man does that? Was this ambition? My heart stays with Caesar where he is buried. Don't get me wrong though Brutus is still right but its okay to be sad about Caesar.

First Citizen: Awh its ok Antony don't cry! I mean was Caesar really ambitious?

Second Citizen: He must not have been ambitious!

Antony: The assassins aren't honorable at all! Duh, like they were totally in the wrong to kill Caesar. And you call them honorable? Like you're all stupid! O my gosh. Here is Caesars will. Shall I read or ummm like..

All: Read the will. Read it, come on! We wanna hear it Antony!

Antony: Chill guys, I shouldn't read it. Its not right for you to know okay! I'm glad you don't know that you are heirs of Caesar because then what would happen?

First Citizen: Ughh I wanna hear it. Come on, O my gosh tell us.

Antony: SHUT UP!!! I shouldn't have even told you.

All: Its his will!!!!! You stupid man!

Third Citizen: Come down from there, right now!

[Antony Comes down.] [Antony takes off Caesars mantel to show where the daggers went through.]

Antony: See, Brutus and Cassius stabbed him here! You see.

Second Citizen: I'll get back at them. Like O my gosh they will pay!

All: AHHHH! Get them! Antony: Guys, don't be stupid stay here. I am not here to get you on my side and I am not a speaker like Brutus but I speak the truth and blunt and to the point like duh. For every stab wound let us rise to mutiny!

First Citizen: We'll burn Brutus' house! Ugh, he is so dead. Antony: WAIT! Don't you guys want to hear the will? Caesar leaves 75 silver coins and property to everyone of you! (OMG that's so cool!)

Third Citizen: O Caesar, I love you sooo much! Antony: Dude, like Caesar is going to let all of us use his parks and gardens for ourselves!

First Citizen: We'll turn him to ash in the holy place, okay guys.

[Exit Citizens with Caesars body.] [Octavius and Lepidus are at Caesars house]

Servant: I heard that Brutus and Cassius are running around like crazy chickens through the school. Antony: Bring me to Octavius!

Scene 3 Cinna- Like last night I had a dream that like a had a feast with Caesar, and like recent events caused me to imagine some awful things. Like there is no will for me to wander forth of doors. But like oh my god something keeps leading me forth.

First Citizen- Like what is your name?

Second Citizen- Where are you like going?

Third citizen- Where do you go?

Fourth Citizen- Like are you a married man, or um like a bachelor?

Second Citizen- Like gosh answer everyone directly.

First Citizen- And like briefly.

Fourth Citizen- Yeah and wisely

Third Citizen- Yeah and like truly, you were like best.

Cinna- What is my name? Like where I'm going? Where do I dwell? Am I liked married or not? Then to like answer everyman directly and briefly, wisely and like truly: wisely I say yeah I am like a bachelor.

Second Citizen- That is like all you have to say. They are like fools that marry. You will get beat up for that, I do fear-a. Proceed- where are you going.

Cinna- Directly I am like going to Caesar's funeral... gosh.

First Citizen- As like a friend or a enemy?

Cinna- As a friend duh.

Second Citizen- That was answered directly

Fourth Citizen- Where do you like go

Cinna- Briefly by the capitol.

Third Citizen- Like you name sir?

Cinna- Truly my name is Cinna

First Citizen- Like hello he's a conspirator. Tear him to pieces

Cinna- Am not! I am Cinna the Poet!

Fourth Citizen- Like tear him to pieces for his lies! Tear him for his lies!

Cinna- I am like most definitely not Cinna the conspirator, duh!

Fourth Citizen- So what, your name's still Cinna. Like how bout we tear his name from his heart and like send him away.

Third Citizen- Like tear him, tear him! [All attack Cinna and he dies]

All: To Brutus, to Cassius like burn 'em all! Go like some to Decius' house and some to Casca's, and like some to Ligarius'! Go like now! [Exit all the citizens]